Is that a bird in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?
Two idiots tried to smuggle a bunch of songbirds into the country from Vietnam, tucking them in their pants. I guess there’s no homeland security search in the Vietnamese airports, or they would have noticed the bird droppings and feathers floating onto these guys’ shoes.
But the guards at LAX were on their game, and could smell the avian flu coming from a mile away. Those feathers sticking out of Dong’s socks was a dead giveaway, as was the poop smears on his shoes. And that wasn’t Dixie he was whistlin…
The poor birds had to suffer on the long flight from Vietnam attached to his smelly, hairy legs. And these were no partridges in a pear tree…they had no food except for the embedded ticks most likely creeping around this guy’s legs. Where’s PETA when you need them?
But it seems someone has been lax at LAX, because a further search of Dong’s dump uncovered 51 songbirds already illegally smuggled in. Now, I ask you, who’s the bird-brain here?
Gives new meaning to the term “more leg room” on a flight, doesn’t it?